Inner Worlds

In a week where I’ve found myself more than a little challenged to keep a grip on my inner peace, a couple of things have come along to provide some upliftment for those bad hair days of the soul. Firstly, mindful of the question of environment and the effect it has on our mood and behaviour, I’ve indulged in the seasonal no-holds-barred chuck-out generally known as spring cleaning and am proudly sitting in a tidy office, free of the usual clutter. My heaving wardrobes have had the same treatment, so the local charity shop is about to benefit from a load of designer cast-offs that I just can’t justify hanging on to any more. That’s the design fault implicit in buying good stuff – you tend to keep it longer because it cost so damn much in the first place. Mind you, it’s a bit of a paradox because classics have an enduring appeal and can still look good years later, but at some point you just have to bite the bullet and let them go. Now, before you begin to think I’m becoming extremely virtuous and almost zen-like in my minimalism, let me just say that I never even considered thinning out the ranks of my handbag or shoe collections. Some things are just sacred.

Apropos of upliftment, I’ve been having some interesting chats with my artist friend, Mette, this week, about awareness and mindfulness. We’ve been treading a similar path of self-development and spirituality for many a year now, so we know the process pretty well – and particularly the pitfalls. One of the downsides of developing more awareness and living more consciously is that you don’t really ever get to get away with anything anymore. If you stay in unconscious mode, you get to blame everyone else when something goes wrong, but with mindfulness not only do you feel the need to take responsibility for your own behaviour, but you also need to let go of judgement, blame and all the other fun stuff we humans like to do.

Sometimes, being compassionate is a tough gig – especially when those around you don’t have the same level of commitment to mindfulness and awareness as you do. But, as Mette and I agreed, there’s no going back when it comes to awareness. It’s like eating from the tree of knowledge – once it’s done, you can’t unlearn it. You might be tempted by old behaviours, because they seem easier, but in reality lack of awareness is the source of a lot more pain than the temporary inconvenience of not being able to blame or judge someone else could ever cause.
So we find our consolations in other ways and for me it’s always a turning inward, a return to an inner-directed awareness, rather than an outer one. In that silence, there’s restoration and peace, a way that allows me to return to the world refreshed and with a hopefulness that will remain with me throughout the day. Being a huge fan of the mystical traditions, it’s no surprise that deep silence is my number one trick for soothing the stressed-out soul. As Caroline Myss says, in her new book, Entering The Castle, “When you enter the castle of your soul … this quality of silence allows you to engage in discernment. You carry this silence within you, even when you are with others. It allows you to hold your centre amid the chaos in your life; it keeps you clear so that you do not do or say things you will regret or make decisions out of fear. Silence is a learned practice that requires far more than just not talking. Not talking is not silence; it’s just not talking.”

She makes a very good point about not talking – even when we think we are audibly silent, our minds chatter away ninety to the dozen. Learning deep silence, as in meditation, is more than just shutting up every once in a while. It’s having a deep reverence for the part of us that is already silent, not drawn by the chatter, not concerned with the outside world – the part of us that is already at rest. This is where the true self resides and why it can replenish us, no matter what is going on outside. Who we are is more than what we wear, who we love, what we do – when we can turn down the soundtrack of our lives, we can start to tap into that deeper self that is not attached to any of those things, nor disturbed by their loss or change.

I’m often talking about the quality of our inner dialogue and how important it is to keep it positive and peaceful. That’s where dipping into the well of silence is such a powerful tool – it’s so much easier to stay peaceful when you feel it from inside, rather than expecting outer circumstances to change your mood for you. To maintain that inner peace, you need an equally peaceful inner dialogue. There’s little chance of holding on to any good feelings if you’re just going to bombard yourself with criticism, doubt and worry the second you return to everyday awareness. This is beautifully illustrated by the work of Dr Masaru Emoto, who has studied the impact on water of various sound and thought vibrations. His pictures show how water responds by changes in its structure, developing complex arrangements of crystalline beauty when exposed to positive influences of music, thought or prayer. Even polluted water samples, which show up originally in quite formless, almost amoebic shapes, can develop beautiful crystal structures when treated with these positive influences. The picture on this page is of a polluted sample from Fujiwara Dam – initially brown, sludgy and shapeless – that was transformed by a prayer offered over it by the priest of a local temple.

I’ve been aware of Dr Emoto’s work for some time, but when it crossed my desk again this week, it struck me just how important it is for all of us to see the physical representation of the effects of sound and thought. After all, we’re largely water, so these are the kinds of reactions that are going on in our own body chemistry all day, every day, whether we are aware of them or not. It’s not only the positive influences that showed changes: as you would expect, dissonant sounds and angry thoughts had a destructive effect on the water composition. If you want your own inner environment to be a beautiful one, then you must pay attention to the quality of energy you surround yourself with, as well as the quality of your own inner dialogue. If you’d like to see more pictures of water crystals – before and after various influences – go to www.adhikara.com/water.html.

This week, pay attention to your inner environment. Notice the thoughts that are running through your mind and begin to consciously slow them down and choose the ones you want to focus on. If you find yourself obsessing about something negative, choose to shift your focus to something you feel enthusiastic about or uplifted by. It takes practice, but it can be done. The first trick is always to slow your breathing. When the breath slows, the mind will always follow. Then pick something that’s positive and imagine how much you’ll enjoy it when you do it or concentrate on how grateful you are to have that thing or person in your life. Whenever you’re feeling stressed and under pressure, go back to slowing your breath down and saying something to yourself like “I have all the time I need”. When you can, try for some deep silence. Sit quietly, breathe slowly and learn to just sit, allowing thoughts to come up and let them pass by easily as you focus on your breathing. The more you do this, the longer the spaces will be between thoughts and the more you will feel your own true inner sense of peace. Have a blissful week!

Click through to the Coach Fabulous advice column by using the link in the Favourite Sites section on the right or by going to http://coachfabulous.blogspot.com. For alert emails on new postings, email subscribe@iamfabulous.co.uk. To contact me, email coachfabulous@iamfabulous.co.uk. All material © 2007 Alison Porter. No article may be reproduced in full or in part without the express permission of the author. (Originally posted 9 Apr 07)