Higher Vision

We all have our trials and tribulations. As my father says, some days you’re the pigeon and some days you’re the statue. What helps us get through our ‘statue’ times is a deeper sense that there’s a greater purpose at work. If you feel that you’re the victim of a random universe – or a pigeon on a mission – it’s hard to take refuge in the idea that what you’re experiencing can offer you anything in terms of wisdom or growth. Even more frustrating, when you’re in the midst of a difficult issue, justice and fairness can appear to be well and truly absent. However, when you lift yourself up to a higher perspective and are willing to let go of the need to know why things occur, comfort can be found.

Of course, when you want to get a message across, there’s nothing more powerful than a good story. You’ll see this used to great effect in the new book by the astrologer, Robert Ohotto, Transforming Fate Into Destiny. He advocates raising our perspective from ego prayer to soul prayer when petitioning the Divine for what we think we need in our life. In his view, “Ego prayers originate mainly out of what we think we want … sometimes these are things we’re told are important by the media and our culture, parents and peers”.

To illustrate the concept, he gives a fictional example of an ego prayer by a character called Mike, including this passage – “I hate my current boss, He’s always criticising me and never appreciates the hard work I do – he totally reminds me of my father. This new book I’m reading says prayer and visualisation are powerful, so I’m going to visualise making a million dollars by next year through this new internet gig – could you give me a hand with that? It would be great if you could help me manifest it! Then I could quit my current job, get some cool clothes, buy a house, lease a new BMW and have money to travel to the Bahamas next fall.”

Ohotto goes on to imagine God’s response as “Let me give you a glimpse of things from my perspective: First of all, before you were born, you made an agreement with your boss that he would come into your life at this time to help you heal your issues with your father and how his criticism wounded you. This means your boss must treat you much like your Dad did in order to trigger your old wounds so that they can surface again and can be dealt with now that you are an adult … this is very important to accept, because where you are going next in your life, you will need to learn how to validate yourself in ways your father could not. You are going to be running a major company in the years to come and will need to be a true leader with authentic soul-esteem. Since that is not done yet, you need to stay in the same job … Now about this financial request, you are not yet mature enough to handle a million dollars. That amount of cash would exploit current flaws in your character that you are not aware of and hinder your spiritual development. At this point, you are not able to handle the choices that come with that amount of money.”

To show the qualities of a soul prayer, Ohotto creates a fictional character named Victoria, who prays “All of my previous requests to be a breakout success as a fashion photographer here in New York City seem to have been ignored. I’m having a really hard time in my life right now; my heart is very heavy. I know I’m meant to be learning things and with your grace I can get through this period.

“You know that I’m currently in a job that I can’t stand. I hate waiting tables when I have a Master’s degree in art and photography – it’s so humiliating. I feel like such a failure. How am I going to continue to get by as a waitress living here in New York? Although I came here two years ago to explore creative opportunities in the fashion industry, nothing is panning out, and I feel lost and invisible. Am I on the right path? Is there another way I’m meant to use my talents and skills? Waiting tables can’t be all there is for me in this lifetime – right? Please show me what I need to learn so that I can go on to the next part of my journey. I’m willing to look at whatever I need to within myself in order to heal and move my life forward.”

In this dialogue, the Divine responds to Victoria’s soul prayer by telling her “I know that you have been having a hard time and that things have been tough, but it has all led you to this point of authentic surrender. Although you came to New York City wanting to be a fashion photographer, that is not really your dream, but only what you thought you wanted in order to belong and ‘be somebody’. Things have not worked out over the past two years so that you would begin to clarify what your soul truly wants to create in this lifetime.

“You are just about done with this lesson, my dear. I will sustain you through this time of difficulty as your ego’s desires burn out and your heart ignites. You were never meant to work in the world of fashion and you wouldn’t have been truly happy there. But you are indeed meant to be a professional photographer. When you are finally ready, I am going to help you to become incredibly successful. For now you must learn the lesson of humility and surrender. When you can feel just as good about yourself as a waitress as you would being a famous photographer, then you will be ready for the next steps in your journey. Until then, you must stay in your current job.”

If you have a problem that’s bugging you right now, try lifting your vision to a higher perspective and formulating a soul prayer to help you see what qualities this might be strengthening in you or what old wounds might be coming up for you to heal. Assume that there’s a purpose in what you’re experiencing – rather than bemoaning your circumstances, turn your assumptions upside-down and see what good might be obscured by what you have decided is bad. There’s no guarantee you’ll figure it all out right away, but at least having a sense of soul purpose will lift you out of victim mentality and into a much more creative frame of mind, knowing that there’s meaning to whatever you’re going through.

Use soul prayers to help you to open to the guidance that will get you on track. As Ohotto says, “Soul prayers ask of the Divine: Please infuse my contribution to this situation with your deepest wisdom and my highest potential. Show me, dear Universe, where I am afraid to hear your answer to my prayer, where I am blocking my own clarity, and why.”

To find out more about Robert Ohotto’s work, he’s regularly interviewed for the I Can Do It show on http://www.hayhouseradio.com/ and his personal website is http://www.ohotto.com/. If you really want to get out there, post your prayer on http://www.dear-god.net/ – the latest non-denominational online bulletin board for prayers brought to you by the founder of Cool Hunter.

For the Coach Fabulous archives, go to www.coachfabulous.blogspot.com and for the I Am Fabulous archives, go to www.fabcentral.blogspot.com. You can email me at coachfabulous@iamfabulous.co.uk. All material ©2008 Alison Porter. No article may be reproduced in full or in part without the express permission of the author. (Originally posted 7 Apr 08)

Inner Worlds

In a week where I’ve found myself more than a little challenged to keep a grip on my inner peace, a couple of things have come along to provide some upliftment for those bad hair days of the soul. Firstly, mindful of the question of environment and the effect it has on our mood and behaviour, I’ve indulged in the seasonal no-holds-barred chuck-out generally known as spring cleaning and am proudly sitting in a tidy office, free of the usual clutter. My heaving wardrobes have had the same treatment, so the local charity shop is about to benefit from a load of designer cast-offs that I just can’t justify hanging on to any more. That’s the design fault implicit in buying good stuff – you tend to keep it longer because it cost so damn much in the first place. Mind you, it’s a bit of a paradox because classics have an enduring appeal and can still look good years later, but at some point you just have to bite the bullet and let them go. Now, before you begin to think I’m becoming extremely virtuous and almost zen-like in my minimalism, let me just say that I never even considered thinning out the ranks of my handbag or shoe collections. Some things are just sacred.

Apropos of upliftment, I’ve been having some interesting chats with my artist friend, Mette, this week, about awareness and mindfulness. We’ve been treading a similar path of self-development and spirituality for many a year now, so we know the process pretty well – and particularly the pitfalls. One of the downsides of developing more awareness and living more consciously is that you don’t really ever get to get away with anything anymore. If you stay in unconscious mode, you get to blame everyone else when something goes wrong, but with mindfulness not only do you feel the need to take responsibility for your own behaviour, but you also need to let go of judgement, blame and all the other fun stuff we humans like to do.

Sometimes, being compassionate is a tough gig – especially when those around you don’t have the same level of commitment to mindfulness and awareness as you do. But, as Mette and I agreed, there’s no going back when it comes to awareness. It’s like eating from the tree of knowledge – once it’s done, you can’t unlearn it. You might be tempted by old behaviours, because they seem easier, but in reality lack of awareness is the source of a lot more pain than the temporary inconvenience of not being able to blame or judge someone else could ever cause.
So we find our consolations in other ways and for me it’s always a turning inward, a return to an inner-directed awareness, rather than an outer one. In that silence, there’s restoration and peace, a way that allows me to return to the world refreshed and with a hopefulness that will remain with me throughout the day. Being a huge fan of the mystical traditions, it’s no surprise that deep silence is my number one trick for soothing the stressed-out soul. As Caroline Myss says, in her new book, Entering The Castle, “When you enter the castle of your soul … this quality of silence allows you to engage in discernment. You carry this silence within you, even when you are with others. It allows you to hold your centre amid the chaos in your life; it keeps you clear so that you do not do or say things you will regret or make decisions out of fear. Silence is a learned practice that requires far more than just not talking. Not talking is not silence; it’s just not talking.”

She makes a very good point about not talking – even when we think we are audibly silent, our minds chatter away ninety to the dozen. Learning deep silence, as in meditation, is more than just shutting up every once in a while. It’s having a deep reverence for the part of us that is already silent, not drawn by the chatter, not concerned with the outside world – the part of us that is already at rest. This is where the true self resides and why it can replenish us, no matter what is going on outside. Who we are is more than what we wear, who we love, what we do – when we can turn down the soundtrack of our lives, we can start to tap into that deeper self that is not attached to any of those things, nor disturbed by their loss or change.

I’m often talking about the quality of our inner dialogue and how important it is to keep it positive and peaceful. That’s where dipping into the well of silence is such a powerful tool – it’s so much easier to stay peaceful when you feel it from inside, rather than expecting outer circumstances to change your mood for you. To maintain that inner peace, you need an equally peaceful inner dialogue. There’s little chance of holding on to any good feelings if you’re just going to bombard yourself with criticism, doubt and worry the second you return to everyday awareness. This is beautifully illustrated by the work of Dr Masaru Emoto, who has studied the impact on water of various sound and thought vibrations. His pictures show how water responds by changes in its structure, developing complex arrangements of crystalline beauty when exposed to positive influences of music, thought or prayer. Even polluted water samples, which show up originally in quite formless, almost amoebic shapes, can develop beautiful crystal structures when treated with these positive influences. The picture on this page is of a polluted sample from Fujiwara Dam – initially brown, sludgy and shapeless – that was transformed by a prayer offered over it by the priest of a local temple.

I’ve been aware of Dr Emoto’s work for some time, but when it crossed my desk again this week, it struck me just how important it is for all of us to see the physical representation of the effects of sound and thought. After all, we’re largely water, so these are the kinds of reactions that are going on in our own body chemistry all day, every day, whether we are aware of them or not. It’s not only the positive influences that showed changes: as you would expect, dissonant sounds and angry thoughts had a destructive effect on the water composition. If you want your own inner environment to be a beautiful one, then you must pay attention to the quality of energy you surround yourself with, as well as the quality of your own inner dialogue. If you’d like to see more pictures of water crystals – before and after various influences – go to www.adhikara.com/water.html.

This week, pay attention to your inner environment. Notice the thoughts that are running through your mind and begin to consciously slow them down and choose the ones you want to focus on. If you find yourself obsessing about something negative, choose to shift your focus to something you feel enthusiastic about or uplifted by. It takes practice, but it can be done. The first trick is always to slow your breathing. When the breath slows, the mind will always follow. Then pick something that’s positive and imagine how much you’ll enjoy it when you do it or concentrate on how grateful you are to have that thing or person in your life. Whenever you’re feeling stressed and under pressure, go back to slowing your breath down and saying something to yourself like “I have all the time I need”. When you can, try for some deep silence. Sit quietly, breathe slowly and learn to just sit, allowing thoughts to come up and let them pass by easily as you focus on your breathing. The more you do this, the longer the spaces will be between thoughts and the more you will feel your own true inner sense of peace. Have a blissful week!

Click through to the Coach Fabulous advice column by using the link in the Favourite Sites section on the right or by going to http://coachfabulous.blogspot.com. For alert emails on new postings, email subscribe@iamfabulous.co.uk. To contact me, email coachfabulous@iamfabulous.co.uk. All material © 2007 Alison Porter. No article may be reproduced in full or in part without the express permission of the author. (Originally posted 9 Apr 07)