Wake Up & Smell The Coffee

This week’s I Am Fab is going to be a short, sharp burst of inspiration – rather than the customary rambling affair – due to a far too fabulous birthday celebration yesterday. Give me a whiff of champagne and I’m party central, which is of course fun, but does leave one with slightly less enthusiasm for concentration the following day. However, inspiration struck in one of many fizz-fuelled conversations during the afternoon and evening of festivities, when the birthday girl asked a very interesting question: what’s the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?

Of course, our mindset in the earliest part of the day really sets the tone for how the rest of the day will unfold. If you kick off grouchy or stressed, no prizes for guessing the day can only get worse. If you make a conscious effort to focus on positive or peaceful thoughts, you’re laying the foundation for a calmer, happier experience throughout the day.

If you’re a regular reader, you’ll have already surmised that meditation is the first cab off the rank for me in the morning – that and recalling any fragments of dreams that are still lurking about in a sleepy morning mind. It’s always useful to pay attention to what’s going on in your dreams, not only because it’s one way that your subconscious helps you to solve problems or bring to conscious awareness issues that are troubling you, but also because some of our best and clearest intuitive messages can come through dreams.

So, here’s the deal: this week, take the first five minutes of every day to notice what’s going on in your night life by remembering your dreams and writing down any that seem significant. If you don’t do this almost immediately upon waking, you’ll find that the memory of the dream will slip away. The more you do this, the more you will learn your own personal language of dream symbolism, making it a powerful channel for intuitive messages and personal awareness.

Secondly, notice your mood and make a conscious effort to either enhance a naturally good mood or uplift yourself from grumpy grouch mode. One easy way to do this is to pick three things to concentrate on: think about someone that you’re grateful to have in your life; imagine doing something you’ve always wanted to do; and, finally plan a treat – however small – that you’re committed to giving yourself that day. That should get your thoughts on an upward spiral!

If you’re so inclined, go for gold and get in a mini-meditation, by simply focusing on your breath and clearing your mind. Every time thoughts arise, return your focus to your breath. Don’t try too hard, just notice when you’ve become distracted without getting hung up on it. The aim of the game is peacefulness, not perfection. Give yourself the gift of stillness and it’ll pay dividends you cannot yet imagine.

Have a fabulous week and notice what a difference even small changes like these can make.

Click through to the Coach Fabulous advice column by using the link in the Favourite Sites section on the right or by going to http://coachfabulous.blogspot.com. For alert emails on new postings, email subscribe@iamfabulous.co.uk. To contact me, email coachfabulous@iamfabulous.co.uk. All material © 2007 Alison Porter. No article may be reproduced in full or in part without the express permission of the author. (Originally posted 2 Oct 07)

A World Of Stillness

Due to the buggeration factor of dealing with AOL, this week’s blog has taken an unusual turn. Now that I’m exhausted from the sheer frustration of dealing with outdated disks, ineffective downloads and call centres located on the Indian subcontinent where they appear to know less about computers than I do – which, as you can imagine is quite an achievement – I’ve decided to devote today’s edition to a quick and dirty round-up of some free online resources for inner peace. Physician, heal thyself, I hear you cry – well, this is what I listen to when I’ve had yet another encounter with the lack of customer service department …

Hay House Radio

I’m always banging on about how fab their shows and hosts are, but now they’ve introduced a new feature called Meditations To Go. There’s live streaming every day, but it’s much more convenient to log on to the archives and download it all to your iPod, so you can get comfy and chill out in full lounge lizard style.

There are meditations on stress management, relaxation, personal healing and strengthening your immune system to choose from and more are being added each week, so you’re bound to find something you like. They’re short and simple to follow, so even if you’re a total novice, you’ll find that a quick guided visualisation will help you calm your mind and tap into a little peace in a busy day.

Go to www.hayhouseradio.com and fill out a simple form to sign up for access to the archives. Then, from the archive home page, go into Weekly Shows and select Meditations To Go, to see all the options. The downloads are simple to do, by right-clicking icons next to the programme details – there are plenty of instructions for the faint-hearted – and you can sign up for podcasting as well, so that they’re automatically downloaded for you each week. That way there’s just no excuse not to do it!

Denise Linn

If you’re determined to make this year different, but might already be on a wobble as far as the resolutions go, you can try Denise Linn’s 28-day soul-coaching programme to make this your most authentic year yet. For each day in the series, there’s a short audio programme, including a brief guided meditation and most aren’t much longer than 15 minutes. They’re at www.deniselinn.com/28DaySoulCoaching.htm. Again, it’s a simple process – with no sign-up necessary – but you should get your skates on if you want to take advantage of it, as it was intended to be a programme for January, so I don’t know how long it will be up on the site.

Caroline Myss

On her site, there’s something called a visual meditation, which will guide you through some thoughts about how you see the day ahead and reminding you to stay in the present moment. Try it at www.myss.com/vismed.asp.

The Secret

If you like your meditations to be of the video persuasion, then this site has a couple of guided visualisations on prosperity and health, with very strong visuals. Go to www.thesecret.tv/secret-treasures.html to download them.

Orin

This is the home of a fabulous selection of mini-meditations, mostly around 5 mins or so, that will perk you up on even the crabbiest of days. Themes include self-love, joy, life purpose and feeling energetic. Take your pick at www.orindaben.com/meditations/orinmeditations.php.


That should keep you occupied for a while. In the meantime, I shall retire to the chaise longue to recover from my close encounters of the absurd kind with AOL. Have a fabulous week! Oh, and did I mention it's taken me ages to even get this lot up here, as AOL blogs are suddenly and inexplicably unavailable? Don't get me started ...

Click through to the Coach Fabulous advice column by using the link in the Favourite Sites section on the right or by going to http://coachfabulous.blogspot.com. For alert emails on new postings, email subscribe@iamfabulous.co.uk. All material © 2007 Alison Porter. No article may be reproduced in full or in part without the express permission of the author. (Originally posted 5 Feb 07)

The Right Stuff

The freelance life has brought a lot of flexibility to my concept of an office – generally for a few days a week it’s table number one in my favourite restaurant, last week it was anything from a rather cramped airline tray table to a beach bar in Olü Deniz, and today I’m utilising the perfect space for knocking out a bit of copy in total comfort, ie my bed. If we weren’t heading into winter, I’d invest in one of those fabulous outdoor Turkish day-beds – which I now know to be called a kösk – with a canopy swathed in silk and loaded to the hilt with cushions, but sadly that’s not a viable option in anything but high summer here in weather-challenged England.

I’ve resorted to the bed-writing concept as I seem to have turned into Ms Busy of late, which is rather wreaking havoc on my normal laid-back lifestyle. Gone is the time to goof about of a morning pretending to meditate or indulging in a half-hearted attempt at Chi Gong, so life is requiring me to be a tad more organised if I want to fit in all the stuff that keeps me ticking over. For me it’s clear that although there’s a lot that can go by the wayside, there are some cornerstones to my life that guarantee a more peaceful transition into the day and they can be modified, but never completely sacrificed.

Most people aren’t up to much until they’ve had their first cup of coffee, but I’m a bad news bear unless I get a chance to slip in even the most minimal meditation session. If I have the time, I’ll try all sorts of things that would pretty much guarantee me a cameo role in Ab Fab, such as chanting, body prayers, stillness practices or good old-fashioned guided meditations. Having studied spiritual practices of the world religions, there’s nothing better than taking advantage of this enormous devotional smorgasbord and trying out new practices to refresh your connection to the spiritual life. Bottom line, though, it doesn’t need to be anything fancy. On a busy day, even five minutes of inner peace is enough to top up the reserves and leave you feeling in tune and on purpose.

Spiritual practice needs to be something that enhances your life and brings you joy, not something you feel is a chore or an imposition. That’s one of the reasons I tend to use a lot of variety in my own meditations, because I try to make them responsive to how my life is unfolding. Some practices are better for gathering energy, others are more calming and some bring a very strong, heartfelt sense of connection to all life.

In a world where we’re all increasingly busy, simplicity is an even greater attraction. We’re over-stimulated by too much choice – even just ordering a coffee is a complex business when you have to decide if it’s a decaf, skinny, grande, latte, mocha choca whatever – and we’re absolutely strung out on information overload. Overflowing email inboxes and incessantly ringing mobile phones mean we’re more in touch than ever, yet somehow we actually communicate less. Messages are staccato and include just the basics, becoming more and more impersonal. Time is the commodity we all want, allegedly to spend with our family and friends, but we’re busy getting anything but.

This particular downward spiral of busyness will never solve itself of its own accord. You have to grab it by the throat and take charge of your own schedule in a gung-ho kind of way that brooks no interference. Some things just have to be sacred. It doesn’t mean you can’t be flexible, but it does mean that you have to start choosing what’s important to you and carving out time in your life for it.

If this seems slightly contradictory to last week’s suggestion that you loosen up your schedule and make space for serendipity, then welcome to the wonderful world of paradox, ie life. It’s a balancing act of structure and space, and only you can determine if it’s working in the right way for you. I tend to need a lot of freedom, but I’ve also realised that structure serves me to ensure that I have time for the things that I enjoy and the practices that keep me sane.

Funnily enough I used to be such a complete lounge lizard that my dream life would have been being carried around on a sedan chair – OK, that bit’s still true – but in the past year I have inexplicably discovered the joy of exercise, so much so that I structure my days to ensure I have time to make it to classes. Any of my friends reading this will probably be in shock right about now, because this is a bit of a guilty secret, but I’ve somehow managed to get past the ‘exercise as pain in the arse’ barrier to discover that it makes me feel better and I actually enjoy it. I’m almost embarrassed to admit that I was glad to be back from my trip so I could settle back into my stretch class and yoga routine – how sad is that? But I digress … the point is that it’s so easy to let life run you, so you have to take a stand for what’s important to you.

Being adaptable is another key trick to holding fast to what you value. Sometimes it’s just not possible to fit in everything you want to, so the fabulous thing to do is to learn to go with the flow and still make sure you carry the essence of what you value with you. Can’t make a class? Five minutes stretching is better than nothing. No time for dinner with friends? Have a coffee. Can’t find enough time for meditation? Even a few deep breaths can be enough to calm you and restore a sense of peace. You get the picture – being rigid means giving things up, but if you’re flexible you can find a way to have even just a little taste of what you enjoy, and that will give you the energy to get through a busy day with more grace and energy.

This week’s fabulous anti-busyness practice is twofold: first make sure you structure in a defined time for something you enjoy and, secondly, create a ‘Plan B’ adaptable version in case life throws a curveball at you. What is it that you want more of in your life? What are you always saying that you’ll do, but never get around to? This week, get it in the diary and make it sacred. Don’t allow anyone to guilt you into postponing it. If you genuinely can’t do it for some unforeseen reason – and it had better be a good one – then create a ‘mini-me’ version that you can manage to fit in to even the busiest schedule. Fabulous people know what makes them tick and they make time for what’s important to them – that’s what makes them fabulous. Be fab and live life your way.

Click through to the Coach Fabulous advice column by using the link in the Favourite Sites section on the right or by going to http://coachfabulous.blogspot.com.
For alert emails on new postings, email subscribe@iamfabulous.co.uk.
All material © 2006 Alison Porter. No article may be reproduced in full or in part without the express permission of the author. (Originally posted 23 Oct 06)